


Running In A Maze

by ALICERAINES



Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-30
Updated: 2014-12-30
Packaged: 2018-03-04 10:42:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3064805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALICERAINES/pseuds/ALICERAINES
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Newts mother has just died. He wants nothing to do with anyone, but Minho refuses to leave newt alone in the state he's in (I suck at summaries this story actually is better than I make it out to be, and i'll probably add smut at some point)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

I sit in the lobby of the hospital, curled up in a small ball, trying to envelope myself into the big brown chair. After all I've been through three past moths, I just need someone or something to sink into. My mother had a long, hard, disastrous battle with type 3 thyroid cancer, and had just left. You would think I would be in the arms of my father, but he abandoned me and my mother, when i was only 3, and the day still haunts me.

I currently have no one left in my family, my mother was my last lifeline, and she had to be plugged into one. She was always there, always holding me in one way or another. Everyday I would come to visit her, and she would hold my left hand, refused to accept my right one. I never knew why and never questioned it, she just did. 

As I stay in my 'Not Comfortable, but Safe From the World' fetal position, I hold my left hand thinking of her, where she is, how long she had to struggle, then I feel my breathe start to hitch again. The last thing I need is for Minho to see me cry again. He's right in front of me, kneeling, holding the concerned look that pisses me off, I hate sympathy, and Minho always gave it to me, no one else.

Everytime we would walk, and I would limp along, he would look over with concern flooding his face. I'm fine, I really am, and I know he cares, but I don't want him to, I'm my own human, myself, I can take care of myself, I don't need anyone's pity.

Minho tries reaching up for my arm, but I nudge it away, I don't want anyone touching me in the state I'm in.

"Newt, Newt we should go home" And that concerned tone too, makes me so bloody upset.

"I don't have a home" The minute my mother passed away, the minute I lose financial support. So the 1 bedroom, 1 bath, 1 of everything else is gone.

"Then come home with me, come live with me, Newt you have no where else to go"

I don't respond, I know he's right, I just don't want to admit it to myself. I would rather die right here, right now, I'm in a hospital anyway, it will be easier to take care of my body.

Minho tries reaching for me again, and that's when i snap. I launch myself out of the chair and yell at him.

"I DON'T NEED YOUR SUPPORT, OR SYMPATHY, OR CHARITY, I DON'T NEED ANYTHING OR ANYONE. I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF AND I HATE HOW YOU ALWAYS WORRY ABOUT ME, GOD MINHO ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH ME OR SOMETHING!? JUST BECAUSE MY MOM IS DEAD, AND I HAVE NO ONE ELSE TO GO TO, DOESN'T MEAN I NEED ANYTHING FROM YOU, OF ALL PEOPLE NOT YOU!"

I regret it as soon as it. comes out. I can see every word pierce through Minho like a bullet. He's still crouched on the ground, a single tear falling from his eye, his lower lip starts shaking, and that's when I leave. I can't stand when people get sad either, just makes me even more depressed. I'm in pain, I know what it feels like, and to see other people have the same feeling pains me even more.

As soon as I exit the hospital, I run, I run as far and fast as I can in this cold damp weather. It's 3:00 am, on December 10th, and I'm running wearing jeans with a short sleeved shirt, and I enjoy it.

Some may say I'm crazy, I just say I'm living. It's nice to feel something other than sadness, even if it's the sharp, buzzing cold. I feel something else something for a change.

I turn the corner after only about 10 minutes of running, I have no idea where I am, and there are no buildings, I have passed them all. I'm on a thin, cracked road surrounded by nothing but field. I look up and see the full moon showering its silver light on the land around me. The stars scattered in nothing in particular and I think I felt my mouth curl into something other than a frown. A smile

The smile is very small, and may mean nothing on the outside, but right now it means everything. After months of wearing an expressionless face, feeling this make my face almost hurt. 

After God know's how long, reality hits me along with a gust of wind, and I remember where I am, what I did, what I forgot, what I lost, and I say "everything", because "everything" is the only, and perfect word that fits those categories. The only thing I'm thankful for, is the that I remembered my phone in my pocket. I pull it out, and the screen is as bright as the moon I squint my eyes and see shining on the screen read:

'4 missed calls'

11 missed texts'

"Minho" I mutter. All of the texts are saying how 'He's so sorry" And how he should have "Respected what you wanted" I scroll through the forever long texts and one thing catches my eye. I thought I was just seeing things, until i read the whole message, and I soon regret my whole life

Newt, you mentioned something in the lobby, well a couple of things actually 

but one thing, was much more true, than the other truths,

you said that you thought i was in love with you, and newt, your right, i am, I'm in love with you

i have been since middle school.

every little thing you do sparks something inside me that no one else can.

your so strong and independent, i don't think you know how amazing that is.

your mother just died, and you refuse to take anything from anybody 

and i love that about you, i love you and I'm worried about where you are

Newt, with the state your in its not safe for you to be alone

just let me be with your until you feel human again

please newt please

 

I read the message, and I can't tell if the weight of the world has been lifted off of me, of if I have been crushed by the weight of the universe. Minho said he loved me, did I love him? Did I feel secure with him, happy, stress free? Yes to all of those, but did that mean love?

I remembered I made a joke about it in the lobby, because I was scared, because I knew he was the only person I still had any connection with, because yes... in fact, I did actually love Minho. Not all of those things equal love, their only a small bit of what makes it all up.

It all made sense now. The caring, the watching, the constant look of worry, Minho was in love with me and I was completely oblivious, I hurt him the way everything hurts me.

Once again i'm hit with reality and I know what I have to do, I have to go to Minho. I run again, but this time I leave everything behind me. Stress, depression, regret, it's now just apart of the wind that gusts behind me. I still don't know where I am but I have to find my way to Minho, I have to.


	2. Something Warm

I lean out of breath on a brick wall in the middle of Barnes, London. I still don't know where I am, even in this small town. I remember the street I'm on from driving to Minho's house a couple of times. Then again that was when it was bright, when I could see everything. But right now I can barely see my own hand.

The dark clouds have covered up the once clear sky, and it started to snow. Feeling weak and defeated, I pull out my phone, nothing more from Minho, but I still call him. After two rings he picks up

"Newt hey where are you are you okay what happened I'm so sorry it's jus-"

"Minho stop bloody apologizing for nothing and pick me up, I'm by that blue doored coffee shop"

"Yes, okay I know where that is, I'll come get you"

There was a pause on the phone, all I could hear was the soft static "Newt, did you see my messages?"

Another pause, "Let's talk about this in the car" Minho broke the static filled silence, and I nodded my head, like he would see. 

"Newt stay there I wont be long" I hung up. Minho was using the concerned voice again, but this time, I felt like I needed it, like I needed someone to care for me. My mom cared for me, but not in the way other mothers do. She couldn't hold or hug me, she couldn't make my favorite meal or go to my performances, she could barely even talk. but she still cared for me, in her own way.

"left hand" i think aloud. i still dont know about that, will i ever?I start to feel nauseous and sit on the curb, shivering in my snow covered skin, but still savoring the odd feeling.

I only sat for a couple more minutes until Minho pulled up in his car. He ran out holding one of his college sweatshirts, ushering for me to put it on. Slowly, shakily, I throw on the oversized sweatshirt.

I thought I could keep it together, that I could ride all the way back to Minho's, take a shower, then go to sleep without any words spoken, and breathes hitched, or any tears cried, but as soon as I saw Minho's eyes, I collapsed into him, letting the bottle of my being drain. I wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his neck, letting my lips press into the warm skin. He started whispering something to me, something, but I couldn't hear, I was too cold and tired to listen to anything but my own thoughts, even then they didn't start to make any sense due to exhaustion.

I stopped fighting the wave of tired and let it crash over me, let it flood me into Minho's arms. He could feel my body go limp, picked me up, set me in the car, and the last thing I remembered, were his soothing words lulling me into a deeper, well deserved sleep.

~

I burst awake with a panic, looking around the room trying to make sense of everything, then it all came hitting me again, my mom, my words, my sore body, all of it, making me fall back down into the safety and warmth of the sheets, of Minho's sheets.

One detail I had forgot was Minho taking me to his house. I turn over to find nothing but unmade bed sheets, I feel an odd flow of sadness wash over, until I heard a door open from the bathroom. Minho walked out in nothing but a towel covering his waist, his toned, well built, body gleaming with water.

I snap out of my new-found daze, and look up to see him smiling all goofy, then I soon found the same smile on mine. Smiling still felt strange, still didn't feel normal. but I know if I were to stay with Minho, smiling would be the only ordinary thing. 

He walked over and sat on the bed, out of all the things he could have done, he grabs my left hand. I stare at the tight grip he has on me, like he's afraid m going to fall., I can feel the tears build up, but this time I don't hold them back. I was safe with Minho, he wouldn't judge me, or say anything really, and that was all I needed.

After a couple minutes of soft sobbing and quiet hiccups, Minho let go of my hand, and wrapped me in his strong arms. I still felt like he thought I was falling, like if he let go I would just disappear. On the outside you would think he's wrong, but if he lets me out of his sight, if he's not touching me 24/7, who knows what I would do.

While wrapped in his arms, I realize how much I actually love him. For the past 3 months I put these walls up around me, and wouldn't let anyone console me, but right now, it's the only thing I could ask for.

"I love you too" I whisper.

"What's that?" Either Minho was at disbelief, or he really just didn't hear.

"Minho I love you too, I always have, but I never knew, you were always there for me, but never once did I realize it." My voice was growing slightly louder, and you could finally hear confidence in my voice. 

"No matter what I did, or what I said, you were there. And Minho I love you for that, you put up with bloody nonsense. I love you so much and I hate how much time I wasted not admitting it to myself. But here I am, right now, admitting it to us and I Minho I love you"

I was crying again, but this time it didn't feel sad, it felt sincere, and almost happy. I looked back up at Minho, and saw that one tear again, like the one in the hospital, but I could tell his was also grateful. I grabbed his left hand, lightly squeezed, and felt the soft squeeze back. It was the squeeze that meant ' I'm here for you ' or ' I love you, its okay '.

Minho pulled me back in the tight embrace "Newt, I've been waiting to hear that...for so long" The last part was out with a hard sob. I felt bad that I made him cry, but a million times better to know that he finally knew that I loved him. and better that I knew I loved him. 

I pulled out of his arms, looked him in his bright brown eyes, took my hand to his face, and kissed him. Making up for so much lost time. This kiss was strong, but felt so soft, I felt like I couldn't get close enough to him, the whole time I was trying to get closer. After my failed attempts, I broke apart, and gasped lungs full of air, and for the first time, in so long, I had the biggest, widest, most grateful smile, a smile for Minho.


End file.
